Hey !
Throughout my life I suppose, the name of the game has always been...to wait.
'atimetowait' perhaps.
I embarked at 17, a treatment plan for what is my rheumatoid arthritis.
Growing up as a classically trained musician - percussion, theory, performance.
Founded my discipline. What follows me for the rest of my life, may just be the way of practicing it, still.
My arthritis kicked up young...it's been treatment for it all, the past 7 years.
I've had to give up my love for performing since.
The treatments for even arthritis, which I feel is what most people miss, reside in chemo & immuno-suppresant therapies. They take tolls.
Despite it, I've made over 2200 songs - 600 of which, exist publicly.
The vast majority however, are for myself!!
I went back to school, my passion for security, especially in the digital world only grew since transitioning my gender medically.
And in the midst of still, chemo-therapies for arthritis...I lived life.
Engagements, failures...still, lots of love.
& now w/ watching cancers in my body...it's the harder of it all, to swallow.
Though, viewing the world from a different lens, is all I do.
It's all I maybe, know how to do.
"Weaponizing it" - Ethically...would be the only way forward for myself.
The goal is to lean into it.
I find confidence hard,
And in a world where merits, achievements, and your network of connections mean...everything.
Myself hopes to lead with my greatest one,
- Still being alive.
Many thanks,
xx
-alice
images sourced from various corners of the internet
a many thanks to https://x.com/tp_p_pt
— a thought experiment w/ love
